Johnny Boy, The SLIP

I read something the head of Asmathic Kitty wrote about reporting/reviewing/etc bands and it has made me more conscious of the things I say about bands. He said something along the lines of 'These are real people who suffer and slave etc to make music for you etc and it is your responsibilty to report accurately and fairly etc', which is true (kinda). So I will behave that way from now on.

This band is a one hit wonder. Their other music is not as good as this and neither are the remixes. I could be wrong, which would be nice. But what a song this one is. It's so completely great. These two woke up one day and made a song that said 'The Crystals were cool, Tommy Jane was cool, I liked the 60's stuff, but I'm completely hip in a cool 21st Century way.' And it doesn't lie.

Johnny Boy - You Are The Generation That Bought More Shoes And You Get What You Deserve [MP3]

MySpace: Here

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This song has all that casual ease of a warm twilight's good-hearted conversation over a smooth whiskey.

This melodic little number goes out to all the people with birthdays this time of year.

The SLIP - Children of December [MP3]

MySpace: Here
Website: Here

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Johhny Boy - Generation

"Fish don't speak but squirrels do. It all depends on your longitude. You should start from the beginning, but ignore the prequels. We like minimalism, broken robots, granny smith apples, sneakers and the mundane. We like make believe vampires but the real ones scare us.

We definitely detest mom jokes. Seriously. We don't need to be reminded of what we resemble. We named ourselves after Midwestern dairy queen civility. We usually involve a variety of livestock running rampantly around. We think sideways motorcycle helmets are all the rage now that sideways trucker's hats are out.

We are live, fleshy human beings attempting to recreate these sounds in real life. We put out our own records. We speak in binary code. We're in the market for an A-team van. We strive for muzak and custom made slip n' slides. We write under pseudonyms. We play for keeps. Our grass is always greenest. Our hair is unkempt."

They forgot to mention how'd they'd like to drink your blood.

Say Hi To Your Mom - Blah Blah Blah [MP3]
Say Hi To Your Mom - Snowcones and Puppies [MP3]

MySpace: Here
WebSite: Here

Buy Impeccable Blahs at, like, their website. Duh.

And I'm tired of receiving emails enquiring as to Scarlett Johansen's status on the Digital For Fish Whore-Or-No™ Meter. Thusly, I provide Exhibits A and B. Whore. Message to all: giving your daughter a name like Scarlett, Mercedes, Crystal or Melody will only result in one thing - Nobel prizes and world peace.

Snakes Say Hisss!

Sometimes my job is pretty easy. I first found these guys during the Snakes on a Plane hysteria (forever onwards to be refered to as the SOAP effect), and not wanting to cheapen their lo-beat 80's synth stylings by throwing them into the snake-hype pit I sidelined them. I think the time has come. This what they have to say for themselves.

"We're pretty hot. There's really no way around it," says Jamie Ayers, the 20-year-old Philadelphia native, sipping Chai tea in a Saratoga coffee shop.

Ayers and Sam Skarstad, also 20, met in September 2005 and began writing and recording songs recounting young summers and sexual frustration; since then they have settled into a sound that combines 80's synth pop with a raw contemporary rock and roll feel.

"We like neon pink and we like hard work", Ayers states.

After a number of small and scattered releases, Snakes joined up with the boys at Famous Class and decided it was time to create a full-length record; hence the sweaty, sweet "I'll Be Lovin' You", the debut album which was recorded shirtlessly over a period of two weeks in a wooden attic in Philadelphia this summer.

"We wanted to create something exclusively for teenage girls. There's not enough out there for them these days", says Skarstad, adjusting his cashmere scarf and platinum ski goggles.

After four sleepless nights and one nervous breakdown, the album was finished.

"The driving synths and heavy beats combine with the spastic live show to create some sort of new experience", says Ayers, staring longingly at a distant waitress.

"We've all heard so much about the missing discourse of desire", he gestures broadly with a flourish of his gaudily bejeweled prosthetic hand, "I think it literally boils down to the fact that everybody is insanely jealous of me."

Snakes Say Hisss! - I Control The Wind [MP3]
Snakes Say Hisss! - We Are Hot [MP3]

That little melody in 'I control the wind' will grow on you. You be singing '..lying on the floor at night' right along with them.

MySpace: Here
WebSite: Here

Buy the album at the Famous Class website for $14. The album glows in the dark.

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On a side note: No Guest List today. Sometimes these things are beyond my control.

Da Bears

These kids are playing their instruments with the curiousity of small children. There is such an element of fun to their experimentation that you can't help but enjoy yourself. That's right, 'experimentation'. You're not afraid of a little experimentation, are you? I know Miss Silva, my 10th grade English teacher, wasn't. The sound isn't completely polished, but it's close and has great hooks. And they're young. It's only gonna get good.

This is going be right up there with my Go! Team, Broken Social Scene and Most Serene Republic fetishes. They're doing something similar to those bands, but with a way more playful attitude. This is just a bunch of kids having fun playing music together. You're there watching, smiling trying to make eye contact with the cute girl in the band.

Da Bears - Cage of Ribs [MP3]
Da Bears - TV Shows [MP3]
Da Beard - Galactic Cannabalism [MP3]

Buy their album for $5 off their MySpace page. $5, sheez.

MySpace: Here
WebSite: Here

Comic Book Fever

If you haven't noticed my minor appreciation of Crystal Castles by now then all i can say is 'good'.

Comic Book Fever - TV Babies [MP3]
Comic Book Fever - TV Babies (Crystal Castles Remix) [MP3]

MySpace: Crystal Castles
MySpace: Comic Book Fever

Often, the best songs make for the saddest memories…

Driving around downtown, Blaire plays something new for me from on her car stereo.

A few seconds into the song, she mentions an ex-boyfriend of hers; a 20-something graffiti kid who spent his time tagging walls and riding the roofs of trains along with his best, but a little less famous, friend Paul.

Blaire vaguely mentions something about loose grips and tight corners; the details are sketchy, but the facts are clear as white chalk and x-rays. Paul was killed, while graffiti kid Josh fell off a train and landed in a wheel chair.

“A few months later, we were all at this party in some Gas Town loft, all hopped up on various narcotic nuances and nuisances.” Blaire says, in that way only she can get away with.

“It must have been like 7 in the morning when it happened. The sun was coming up bright and the few people left behind were coming down fast."

She turns up the volume, “And then, this came on,” she says starting the song again.

"As the song played, I watched Josh wheel himself onto the empty dance floor with half a bottle of Jack tucked firmly between his limp legs. Then, he began spinning his wheelchair around in circles with his head down and his eyes closed."

She takes a sharp turn, and scratches her nose violently with both hands, letting go of the wheel for a few seconds while I press the imaginary brake on the passenger side with my right foot.

"When the chorus hit he raised his head, pounding one fist in the air as he sang along and spun around. He looked like a communist rag doll,” she says.

We don’t speak the rest of the way to the record store; we listen to Goodbye Horses on repeat instead.

As life would have it, I’m halfway across the world,
And doubt I’ll ever see Blaire again,
But whenever I play this song, I can’t help but think of
This 20 something graffiti kid whom I never met, pounding his fist in the air
while spinning circles in his wheelchair
at 7 in the morning in some trashed but pretty loft in Gas Town.

It never fails to remind me
Of why I listen to music in the first place,
And why often
the best songs
make for the saddest memories…

So here is the very rare and mysterious Goodbye Horses. A song that made its way onto Silence of the Lambs. The song that played as Buffalo Bill put on his girly-skin suit and danced footloose and penis-free in his living room, and who knows, maybe he even pounded his fist in the air.

It’s fucked up… and that
my friends
is why it’s beautiful.

Q Lazarus – Goodbye Horses [MP3]

A few more songs for sinners

Cocorosie - Beautiful Boys [MP3]
Sufjan Stevens - John Wayne Gacy Jr. [MP3]
Black Rebel Motorcycle Club - Devil’s waiting [MP3]
Radiohead – I Am A Wicked Child [MP3]

Wikipedia: Q Lazzarus
Wikipedia: Who is John Wayne Gacy?

Klaxons

It's these guys:

Doing that:

In a place like this:

Making you dance. Hard.

Klaxons - Majick [MP3]
Klaxons - Gravity's Rainbow [MP3]
Klaxons - Golden Skans [MP3]

Bonus: An excuse to post the Crystal Castles. Again.

Klaxons - Atlantis to Interzone (Crystal Castles Remix) [MP3]

MySpace: Here
WebSite: Here

Click here. Press CTRL-F. Search for "recorded and compared". Hey, I thought it was funny.

Klaxons - Magick

Chris Garneau

Hark! Their voices had declared it and had commanded that it be done. Their voices had said "Rave", their voices had said "Trance". Some of the flock were doubtful, they showed consternation. "What of our eyes? What of our ears?" was cried out by some. Booming yet gentle, forceful yet calming the demons/angels said: "Fear not simple mortals. Sleep and sobriety are salubrious endeavours of the uninvited. Go forth and do as we have instructed." And, lo, the brave few did exactly what was asked of them and they were made heros/martyrs of men. [DFF: Flex Ch. 1 V. 12-17]

My weekend was 'interesting', to be euphemistic, and now I'm feeling the post-awesome weekend low that a Monday morning communicating with robots brings. So what prey tell do you listen to after spending your weekend and sanity at a pre/mid/nu rave party directly followed by a thumping outdoor trance party? Chris Garneau, my friends. It is a simple as that.

Chris Garneau is a pineapple from Brooklyn, New York. His music is heart-wrenching, perfectly measured, and delivered in a gentle voice that conveys the message exactly as it should be. His album is going to be one of my favourite albums of next year and, hopefully, you like it too.

Chris Garneau - We Don't Try [MP3]
Chris Garneau - Not Nice [MP3]

MySpace: Here
WebSite: Here
Interview: Here

Do your self a favour and check out his friends on MySpace. There is a wealth of great bands/artists hiding there.

My eyes hurt.

Top of the Pops - November

Now in amazing technicolour, some of the best tracks you may have missed in November. Presented in order of link length.

Arms - Kids Aflame [MP3] [Read the Post]
Crystal Castles - Air War [MP3] [Read the Post]
Benoit Pioulard - Palimend [MP3] [Read the Post]
White Flight - Death Hands [MP3] [Read the Post]
The Harlem Shakes - A Night [MP3] [Read the Post]
Can Joann - Indecision's Way [MP3] [Read the Post]
Fujiya & Miyagi - Collar Bone [MP3] [Read the Post]
Professor Murder - Free Stress Test [MP3] [Read the Post]
Of Montreal - The Past is a Grotesque Animal [MP3] [Read the Post]
Continental Divide - The Days Fade, But He's Old [MP3] [Read the Post]

My favourite MySpace friend
Is it just me or do their ties look really ugly
A future father

Friday = Partying = CSS - Let's Make Love and Listen to DFA